There are arguments in every case that won't hold up, but there are others that are downright laughable. Here are a few of those not worthy of an entire post. (I'm paraphrasing these, of course.)
- "It wasn't me that downloaded the child pornography. It was my Internet Service Provider (ISP). You should have suspected them from the beginning." (United States v. Larson, 2011 WL 3837540 (W.D. Miss. 2011))
- "Since I purchased someone else's passport and Social Security card, it wasn't “without lawful authority” for me to try to get a US passport with it." (U.S. v. Ozuna-Cabrera, 663 F.3d 496 (1st. Cir. 2011))
- "You can't search my home for child pornography just because my IP address shared it. Why? Because someone could have connected to my wireless network." (United States v. Gillman, 432 Fed.Appx. 513 (6th Cir. 2002))
- "Someone guessed my password and accessed my computer, and it's unfortunate that I can't prove it because the security records just happen to be missing for the day in question." (United States v. Winkler, 639 F.3d 692 (5th Cir. 2011))
- "I didn't distribute child pornography because I only e-mailed it from my phone to my personal e-mail account." Wait... what? No, the court actually bought this argument despite the statute defining distribution to be "any act ... related to the transfer of material involving the sexual exploitation of a minor." (United States v. Merrill, 578 F.Supp.2d 1144 (N.D. Iowa 2008))
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